New Narrator: "Well, Bebe spent her time radiating not so rare bugs, giving them radiation burns and turning them into plasma bugs or ending up with an irradiated bug on the loose which probably was not the best thing to have happen in the case of turning beetles, spiders or other assorted creepy crawly insects into plasma bugs.
Of course, no-one ever asks the bugs how they feel about this. They might not like the experience...but all in the name of science."
New Narrator: "That evening an alien decided that he was going to pay the male member of the family a visit..."
Haruo: "You think I want to end up impregnated by your pointy-eared spawn, you psycho green-skin!!!?"
Watcher: "I guess he should take that as a no?
Haruo: "No...****, Sherlock!"
New Narrator: "Haruo proceeded to give the pointy-eared alien a piece of his mind..."
Haruo: "You'd better run, you pointy-eared freak, or I'm going to turn your entrails into origami...and hang them off my car rearview like a dream-catcher!"
Alien: "Please don't hurt me..."
Haruo: Take that...and that...and...that..."
Sound effects: SMASH, KERPOW, WHAP!"
Alien: "OW!!!! NOT MY EARS...NOT MY EARS!!!"
Haruo: "You'd better get your green-skinned rear-end out of here if you know what's good for you...and don't come back...tell your friends too."
New Narrator: After dealing with that recalcitrant and obstrusive alien, Haruo, to soothe, his ruffled feathers, went in to make some apple pie.
Haruo: "Hope that alien doesn't come back or I'm going to shove this down his gaping maw...FRESH from the oven."
Watcher: "Dang, third degree interior bodily burns by freshly baked pastry. Wonder how the ER is going to handle this one."
Haruo: "What do you mean...ER? That mangy scumbag alien is going to be headed on a one way trip to the Area 51 Morgue. Tries to make me pregnant, ain't nobody gonna do that to me, no how."
River: "And what makes you so special?! Or do you think that we're the only ones that would be in the family way? Huh?"
Haruo: "Well, you're equipped for that..."
River looks around for a sharp object to castrate Haruo...
Haruo: "I think I hear my skill books calling me."
River: "Chicken! I'm going out for a run."
New Narrator: "So as to not get on even worse terms with River and Bebe, Haruo went outside and planted peaches. I think it was mostly to make sure he stayed out of reach of Bebe and River
...and sharp objects.
New Narrator: "...then he came inside and plunged the toilet. I don't know which was worse; getting into crap or cleaning out crap...either way it was a stinky mess."
Haruo: "Better than losing my man-parts...y'know."
New Narrator: "Then Haruo went into his room and decided to play a game on his laptop.
River and Bebe: "Hey, how come HE gets to have a computer and we don't?
Watcher: "Well, he's a male...and y'know how males get bored...very easily...uh..."
River and Bebe: "...uh Watcher, you're male too..."
Watcher: "Uh...why else do you think I play with Sims' lives, huh? It's not for my health..."
River and Bebe glare at him
Watcher: "Hey, Haruo...you got a two-player game in there? I think I'm going to join you."
River: "I think I've had it with those two, I'm hungry, I'm going to have myself some of that apple pie."
River: (loudly), "And no wise-acre comments about cherry pie either!!! Or I'll neuter you two."
Haruo and the Watcher: (quietly)..."Did you say anything about that? I didn't."
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